Examinations, a period where emotions overcome you to
such extent that you start to behave rather peculiarly. (That fly looks tasty)
Examinations, a period where you curse yourself for leaving off your potions for so long. (I don’t know this and this and this….)
Examinations, a period where you curse yourself for leaving off your potions for so long. (I don’t know this and this and this….)
Examinations, a period where the slightest of things, annoys the hell outta you. (“STOP BREATHING NOSE! YOU'RE MAKING TOO MUCH NOISE!”)
Examinations, a period where you think your life is over and you start to think of the good times.
(Remember when I used to sleep? Ya that was a lot of
fun)
Oh forgotten blog, you might have by now, understood what ails my innocent mind. EXAMS! Oh how the word makes me quiver in fear.
The most important exams of my life is fast approaching and yet here I am, typing away to glory, looking for some solace and peace of mind.
What is it with exams that makes you doubt yourself so, you ask. Well, the mere idea of sitting in a stuffy room with no ventilation and fifty other children while looking at the paper in front of me with my mind as blank as the answer sheet is the reason I doubt myself.
Why, oh why, were exams created?
A teacher must have started them, for no other reason than to play with the minds of his harmless students.
I regret to tell you my dear reader that this entry will not be as humorous as my last. For the exams have made me a notch too serious.
Just week ago, I heard that one of my younger brother's acquaintances had taken his life. (By a rope and a ceiling fan.)
My first thought was:
Oh how sad. How could anyone even think of doing that?
I went on to ask myself the reasons for his committing suicide and got quite a few,
1. The pressure from his parents and teachers.
2. Overworking himself to an extent that he couldn't think straight.
3. Believing the lie that if you don't get a 100% in your exams, life holds nothing for you.
4. Thinking that he was useless, worthless and moreover 'nothing.'
Life is cruel if its purpose is to only do well in your exams.
What is it that drives parents to force their views on their children? What is it that makes them think if we don't come first in class we are a failure?
What lets them do this to us? To break us and makes us to undermine our own precious existence. And finally leaving us with the only option left, to live and bear this torture, or end our lives and finally find some peace.
I regret to say that my second thought, after hearing the way he died was, “How cliché!”
Oh forgotten blog, you might have by now, understood what ails my innocent mind. EXAMS! Oh how the word makes me quiver in fear.
The most important exams of my life is fast approaching and yet here I am, typing away to glory, looking for some solace and peace of mind.
What is it with exams that makes you doubt yourself so, you ask. Well, the mere idea of sitting in a stuffy room with no ventilation and fifty other children while looking at the paper in front of me with my mind as blank as the answer sheet is the reason I doubt myself.
Why, oh why, were exams created?
A teacher must have started them, for no other reason than to play with the minds of his harmless students.
I regret to tell you my dear reader that this entry will not be as humorous as my last. For the exams have made me a notch too serious.
Just week ago, I heard that one of my younger brother's acquaintances had taken his life. (By a rope and a ceiling fan.)
My first thought was:
Oh how sad. How could anyone even think of doing that?
I went on to ask myself the reasons for his committing suicide and got quite a few,
1. The pressure from his parents and teachers.
2. Overworking himself to an extent that he couldn't think straight.
3. Believing the lie that if you don't get a 100% in your exams, life holds nothing for you.
4. Thinking that he was useless, worthless and moreover 'nothing.'
Life is cruel if its purpose is to only do well in your exams.
What is it that drives parents to force their views on their children? What is it that makes them think if we don't come first in class we are a failure?
What lets them do this to us? To break us and makes us to undermine our own precious existence. And finally leaving us with the only option left, to live and bear this torture, or end our lives and finally find some peace.
I regret to say that my second thought, after hearing the way he died was, “How cliché!”
That passing thought made a powerful impact on my mind. I hated myself for the insensitivity of that thought and its reason. That the growing death rates caused by suicide of students makes us think it's natural. That I actually thought it was cliché because so many students have done it before.
WHY? Why does it have to be like this?
It's a Dog-Eat-Dog World and yet we let ourselves be eaten- defeated and lost.
I found out later that the boy attended a popular Tuition center that had an alarming suicide rate of seven students last year. Seven students!! I think it's time that they took a good look at themselves and found the problem and fixed it. Don't they understand they are playing with innocent lives?
When did education become hell? Staying at school for a week to study because you get low grades. No holidays, no fun. The text books become holy. No times for breathers or rest if you want to pass the test.
Is this all that life has to offer for a student?
The coming exams have played a havoc on me. I dream of equations, recite dates when I'm awake and as I study, I have a growing premonition of doom awaiting me. A single line that I don't understand marks failure for me.
My friends' exams have ended and mine have yet to start. I think this just adds to my unhappiness. While they relax and are happy in the post-exam euphoria, here I am, biting my nails with black bags under my eyes.
Don't you ever get the feeling that you just want to curl up in a corner and just forget the world? Yes I'm get that feeling a lot.
But I think the best way to get over any bad time is to imagine the light at the end of a tunnel and so here I am looking forward to the after-party.
I have to say that laying my fears out on a paper gives me a sense of peace. Sometimes you just need to be able to let go of all the fear in you, to tell them to someone or express them in some way. Write, sing, dance, anything that takes the load off of your shoulders.
I wish someone had told the same to that boy. Maybe
the only thing he need was an ear willing to listen. Maybe he just needed a
shoulder to lean on. And maybe he just needed a hand to lift him from the
darkness he had fallen into....
Dear readers, I think I have had my say; the rest is for you to think about. Was what I said right or was I becoming delusional with the exam fever?
Whatever the answer may be, pride yourselves for having read so far in this dreadful blog!
And now I beg your leave once again and hope that you wish me luck for my exams.
ARRIVEDERCI!
*Gets up from the corner and faces the world *
-------------------------------------------------------
Now I lay me down to rest
Pray I pass tomorrow’s test
If I should die before I wake
That’s one less test I’ll have to take
-------------------------------------------------------
Dear readers, I think I have had my say; the rest is for you to think about. Was what I said right or was I becoming delusional with the exam fever?
Whatever the answer may be, pride yourselves for having read so far in this dreadful blog!
And now I beg your leave once again and hope that you wish me luck for my exams.
ARRIVEDERCI!
*Gets up from the corner and faces the world *
-------------------------------------------------------
Now I lay me down to rest
Pray I pass tomorrow’s test
If I should die before I wake
That’s one less test I’ll have to take
-------------------------------------------------------
